1. My mantra is "Can do!"
2. Everything is simple.
3. If something isn't simple, make it simple. If you can't make it simple, it's either a legit huge crisis or you need to just drop-kick it out of your life
4. Don't stress.
5. Don't put yourself down.
6. You are not allowed to date until your hair is long enough to touch your shoulders.
7. Don't even think about dating. If a girl likes you, tell her you're grounded.
8. Be selfish. Indulge in good things for yourself.
9. Stop thinking "I can't do that." Everything is simple.
10. Every rule is important.
More technical guidelines
- Buy fruit and veggies at least every other week.
- Weigh yourself only once a week.
- Keep track of your good days on the calendar - that's what it's there for!
- Junk food is not a reward for good dieting. Buy yourself something pretty.
- Let yourself eat as many freaking fruits as you want. It's seriously OK, we can get more later, and if you aren't overeating on the fruits, you're going to be overeating on something grosser. Eat the damn fruit.
- It's not too much effort to get the fruit or veggies prepared. We've considered jumping through more hoops to make crappy meals. Eat the goddamn fruit.
- Eat the damn fruit.
- Water is good. Flavored water is tasty. Either way, hydrate.
- No chips. Try carrots and ranch.
- Want chocolate? Drink some chocolate milk. You know you don't get enough calcium.
- Vitamins aren't a shelf decoration, sweetness.
- Like a food? Write it down so we can remember to buy it again.
- Don't forget that spices exist in the cupboard. Flavor is helpful.
- If you don't do this now, you're going to get diabetes or some shit. That'll be worse.
- You look good. You look better each time you lose a little more fat.
- We look weird skinny. Don't go that far.